Welcome to the first installment of chatting with idiots.
I will post real unaltered conversations with people from Facebook and MySpace. I warn you though, these people are very stupid.
[11:59 PM] Tina Owens: what is up
[12:04 AM] Tina Owens: im just so tired of shit so how do u know leana
(Not using punctuation, what?)
[12:04 AM] Noah Dolph: I don’t.
[12:04 AM] Noah Dolph: I read about her in the newspaper
[12:09 AM] Tina Owens: omfg what did she do in r u on her facbook
(…In are you on her Facebook? Really?)
[12:09 AM] Noah Dolph: You didn’t hear about what she did?
[12:09 AM] Noah Dolph: She wrecked a car THREE TIMES in a half hour
[12:09 AM] Noah Dolph: http://www.wcfcourier.com/news/local/article_000e574e-ceb1-11de-b6e2-001cc4c03286.html
[12:10 AM] Noah Dolph: Its in the local paper, AND the Chicago paper.
[12:10 AM] Tina Owens: well i dont live around there
[12:10 AM] Noah Dolph: Where do you live?
[12:10 AM] Tina Owens: in newton
[12:11 AM] Tina Owens: yea u know where thats at
[12:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Yes
(wait, wat?)
[12:12 AM] Tina Owens: n how do u know where thats at
[12:12 AM] Noah Dolph: …I live in Iowa?
(WELL NO FUCKING SHIT)
[12:12 AM] Noah Dolph: I travel a lot
[12:13 AM] Tina Owens: oh yea thats cool so hey im goin 2 get off so i can drink with my bf n our friends is that ok with u lol
(I don’t fucking care? Why would you ask me permission?)
[12:14 AM] Noah Dolph: Sure, by all means, drink away
[12:14 AM] Tina Owens: yea but im 18 n a minor but i dont give a fuck im so pissed of so yea
(Should I be calling the police then? Are you asking for help? Maybe you don’t really want to drink?)
[12:14 AM] Noah Dolph: …Ah ok
[12:15 AM] Noah Dolph: Well you have fun being all rebellious and all
(Totally missed the sarcastic insult here.)
[12:15 AM] Tina Owens: ok well bye ttyl
[12:16 AM] Noah Dolph: Bye
….Wow really? This girl is the prime example of problems in this nation, hardcore.
EDIT: I talked to her more…fuck me…
So I decided to try a new angle, I was just going to talk a little bit, and maybe bore her to death…
Tina Owens is no longer idle 1:40 AM
[1:40 AM] Noah Dolph: Hi
[1:43 AM] Tina Owens: OH MY FUCKIN GOD im gettin tired of ppl tryin 2 make me drink me n i dont want 2 ppl drive me n sain
[1:43 AM] Noah Dolph: insane ?
[1:43 AM] Tina Owens: n why did u hang up on me
[1:43 AM] Noah Dolph: I said I’d talk to you on here
[1:44 AM] Tina Owens: yea n why why cant i talk 2 u on the phone
[1:44 AM] Noah Dolph: cause I don’t want to?
[1:45 AM] Tina Owens: is it cause u got someone there n u dont want 2 make them mad or why just tell me cause what u said wasnt good enough
[1:45 AM] Noah Dolph: no
[1:46 AM] Noah Dolph: Its because its late, and I don’t want to wake up my roommate with me talking on the phone
[1:46 AM] Noah Dolph: He has work in the morning
[1:47 AM] Tina Owens: OH MY FUCKING GOD ITS SUNDAY TOMARROW WHAT THE FUCK WHY DO PPL WORK ON THE WEEKENDS
[1:47 AM] Noah Dolph: …Because they have to sometimes?
(Fuck it, at this point, I’m done being nice, and I decided to be a superdick)
[1:49 AM] Noah Dolph: Are you fat?
[1:50 AM] Tina Owens: NOW THEY WANT ME 2 PLAY SOME FUCKIN DICE N I DONT WANT 2 WOULD U MAKE SOMEONE PLAY A GAME THAT SOMEONE WOULDNT WANT 2 PLAY N HELL NO LOOK AT MY PIC ON MY WALL
[1:50 AM] Noah Dolph: ….Your picture is like way small
[1:50 AM] Noah Dolph: And yes, I would
[1:54 AM] Tina Owens: well ok then why u lookin at my tits
(^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ WHERE THE HELL DID THAT COME FROM?! Fuck it. Time to just get creepy super dickish)
[1:54 AM] Noah Dolph: I’m not?
[1:55 AM] Noah Dolph: Unless you want to show me, in fact I was going to ask… Does being friends with you mean I’m going to see your tits someday? Or should I just go ahead and stop talking to you now?
[1:56 AM] Tina Owens: well i might get n trouble by my bf so yea u might want 2 stop
[1:56 AM] Noah Dolph: Well fuck him, I’m far smarter than your boyfriend
[1:56 AM] Noah Dolph: And you used the word might, so you might NOT get in trouble, so why not take a chance eh?
[1:58 AM] Noah Dolph: God please tell me you are using some periods in whatever you are typing with caps lock on…
[1:58 AM] Tina Owens: OH MY FUCKIN GOD HES MAD NOW CAUSE HE JUZ SAW WHAT U SAID N I DONT WANT HIM 2 BE MAD AT ME SO PLEASE STOP
[1:59 AM] Noah Dolph: Good, let the meat head alcoholic piece of shit be mad, you should be mad because he tried to make you play fucking dice, do you know what dice leads to? It leads to drugs Tina. Tina I think that you should break up with him, he has no idea how to treat a lady, I would never force you to play dice, only show your tits to me every once in awhile, and by once in awhile I mean all the time.
[1:59 AM] Noah Dolph: Tina, I’m ready to move to the next level in this relationship, are you ready for that?
[2:01 AM] Tina Owens: NOAH I DONT EVEN KNOW U SO NO IM NOT N HEY I LOVE MY BF N HES MEANS THE WORLD 2 ME SO PLEASE JUZ STOP TALKIN LIKE THAT OK
[2:01 AM] Noah Dolph: Tina you are breaking my heart…seriously I’m like in tears right now Tina, I can’t take rejection well and I might just kill myself, are you ready to have that blood on your hands Tina?
[2:02 AM] Noah Dolph: Are you ready to break a guys heart so bad that he can’t continue to live?
[2:02 AM] Noah Dolph: Everytime I walk down the sidewalk I think of you Tina, I think of holding your hand and skipping through the changing Autumn leaves.
[2:02 AM] Noah Dolph: I’m so sad and alone Tina, just remember the good time will you? The times I didn’t make you play dice?
[2:03 AM] Noah Dolph: TINA I SAW YOUR BOYFRIEND KISSING ANOTHER GIRL BUT I DIDN’T WANT TO BE THE ONE TO TELL YOU….GOD IT HURTS SO MUCH TO SEE HIM TREAT YOU THE WAY HE DOES AND MAKE YOU PLAY DICE LIKE THAT, TELL HIM THAT I WON’T SLEEP UNTIL HE NEVER PLAYS DICE AGAIN TINA, TELL HIM NOW!!!
[2:05 AM] Tina Owens: 0H MY FUCKIN GOD U BETTER STOP SAYIN SHIT LIKE THAT CAUSE MY EX BF KILLED HIMSELF N ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY SO YEA IF U WANT ME 2 DELETE U OFF MY FACEBOOK IF U DONT STOP SO YEA
(Fucking owned, I’m pissing myself)
[2:05 AM] Noah Dolph: NO YOU CANT DELETE ME TINA I WOULD NEVER BE ABLE TO GO ON LIVING
[2:06 AM] Noah Dolph: NOW THAT WE HAVE COMMITTED TO EACHOTHER THIS FAR DON’T YOU THINK WE SHOULD TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL? WHEN HAVE I EVER MADE YOU PLAY DICE TINA WHEN?! WHEN?!?!?! NEVER!!! ID TREAT YOU SO WELL BABY PLEASE HUNNY BE WITH ME!!!
[2:06 AM] Tina Owens: WELL IM GOIN 2 DELETE U NOW IM NOT LIKIN WHAT UR SAYIN I DONT LIKE THIS AT ALL
[2:06 AM] Noah Dolph: PLEASE TINA I LOVE YOU, IS THAT WHAT YOU NEEDED TO HEAR?!
[2:07 AM] Noah Dolph: I LOVE YOU TINA SO MUCH YOU COMPLETE ME! PLEASE BABY! I’LL EVEN STOP USING PERIODS AND CAPITOL LETTERS ILL TYPE JUST LIKE YOU SEE I CAN DO IT YOU DONT HAVE TO READ THROUGH MY HORRIBLE PROPER GRAMMAR ANYMORE ILL EVEN UZ SHORTER LETTRZ 4 U BBY!!!
[2:08 AM] Tina Owens: DUDE THIS IS MY FUCKING COMPUTER IM DRUNK AND YOU NEED TO LEAVE THAT SHIT OUT FO THE CONVERSATION YOU GUYS CAN TALK BUT FUCK THAT SHIT’
(Oh snap! Her boyfriend got online!)
[2:08 AM] Noah Dolph: Hey, Jay?
[2:08 AM] Noah Dolph: Fuck yourself faggot
[2:08 AM] Noah Dolph: Break your keyboard
[2:09 AM] Noah Dolph: You drunk piece of woman beating shit
[2:09 AM] Noah Dolph: I saw you beat her with those dice, that was fucked up bro.
[2:10 AM] Tina Owens: I DIDNT BEAT NO BDY DITCH DONT FUCKING TALK TO US AGAIN BITCH YOU PIECE OF SHIT
[2:10 AM] Noah Dolph: ditch?
(Somebody is mad!)
[2:10 AM] Tina Owens: MOTHER WHORE
(I take that back, Somebody is RAGED!)
[2:10 AM] Noah Dolph: You are the piece of shit you fucking drunken chicken fucker
[2:10 AM] Noah Dolph: I’m sorry are you getting upset?
[2:10 AM] Noah Dolph: Hit your keyboard it will make you feel better, or better yet, beat her with some more dice, you seem to LOVE beating on your girlfriends
[2:10 AM] Noah Dolph: You are a disgusting pig.
[2:10 AM] Tina Owens: FCUKE YOU
[2:10 AM] Noah Dolph: I hope you die of liver failure.
[2:11 AM] Noah Dolph: Whats the matter? How about you go molest some more children huh? I heard you are pretty good at that too bro
[2:11 AM] Noah Dolph: Between molesting children, beating women, and fucking chickens, where do you find time to drink?
[2:11 AM] Noah Dolph: Huh?
[2:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Are you MAD Jay?!
[2:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Are you ANGRY?!
[2:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Are you beating that keyboard yet?!
[2:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Throw this fucking computer out the window because thats the only way you will stop it Jay
[2:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Don’t let her get on the internet ever again
[2:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Make her delete her facebook and delete everything
[2:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Don’t let her out of the kitchen Jay
[2:12 AM] Noah Dolph: Be a fucking man and control your bitch.
[2:13 AM] Noah Dolph: Well? Bro?
[2:13 AM] Noah Dolph: You still there or am I right about you?
[2:14 AM] Noah Dolph: Its ok bro
[2:15 AM] Noah Dolph: I’m going to go ahead and call the police too since you guys are all underage and drinking.
[2:15 AM] Noah Dolph: Later!
Tina Owens signed off 2:17 AM
